Smith & Smith, publishers, in a letter, notify Professor Bernard that they will accept his latest story if he will alter the enclosed paragraph: "Marry me and I will do away with my wife as I did her father." The absent-minded professor leaves this paragraph on his study table while he goes to the store to secure some cloth for his wife. The Professor, however, is very absent-minded, and forgets his mission when he meets a group of firemen who induce him to play a game of checkers. In the meantime, Ellen, the cook, is having her troubles with the butcher boy, who brings liver instead of chops, as ordered.
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When two kleptomaniacs (including the brides’ father) and two actual thieves all attend a double wedding their light fingers cause no end of trouble for the mother of the brides to a dizzying degree!
Rich young Joan Hope is ashamed of how her father made his money--as a chewing gum magnate. While taking a train trip, she meets the Countess of Crex, a member of the Russian nobility--who is, in reality, a jewel thief.
Peggy Raymond, a country girl, comes to New York with plans for a career in art and is taken by mistake to a Fifth Avenue address where she meets Dick Merwin, the scion of a wealthy family, whom she mistakes for her cousin.
William Bradberry, an absent-minded Egyptologist, turns from a henpecked husband to a dominating one who, unknown to his daughter Betty and wife, writes theatre musical comedy on the side.
Silas Croft was a kindly old Englishman who had a farm in South Africa. With him resided his two nieces, whom he had taken from their drunken, worthless father when they were of a tender age.
The boy Is a bachelor of thirty who by diligence and perseverance is on the road to success. The boy's success gains him introduction into fashionable and aristocratic circles.
Veteran Warner and old gardener Burns vie for the hand of Widow Simpson, and the gardener steals the former's uniform and joins in the ranks of a parade, pursued by his rival.
Max is doing the Tango with Miss Leonora in a Berlin night club. Being impressed by the performance a german Baron asks him to give his family a dancing lesson.
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